I'm getting old...

So...I have gotten to the point where I realize that fear of death has taken over the desire to have fun. Yesterday we spent the afternoon at Six Flags...thinking we would have a great time. We were wrong! I have not been so scared for my life in a long time! We rode a huge wooden coaster that was so jarring it was hard to enjoy. Then we went and stood in line for about an hour and a half for the Superman coaster.

I was fine until we got on the ride, then I started to freak out. They put you in this harness and even strap down your ankles because you get turned on your belly for the ride. Did you catch that...you ride this coaster on your belly with all your weight resting on this harness! I got in and got claustrophobic immediately. I had to make the guy let me out to take off my jacket, then I could not get locked in again which freaked me out! They kept calling out my seat number (they have sensors that tell them when a seat is not locked down) and the guy kept checking it but it was not locking! Finally they got it locked but by that time I just knew I was going to fall out and die! The entire ride I just prayed that God would let me make it through! And I did but I will not ride it again!

We then went to the Goliath, which is the largest coaster I have ever ridden...no loops but plenty of drops, and all you had to keep you on was a lap bar. I kept feeling like I was going to fall out there too. Chris got pretty freaked out on that one, said all he could think of the whole time was "what if this lap bar comes loose?" So... after about 5 hours and 3 rides, we were done. I think I will stick to Disney world next time, at least I did not fear for my life on those rides!

photos of our new place

I finally have some photos of the new place... I know a few of you have been wanting to see it. Click here to go to my flickr page.

What a crazy week!

I am officially self-employed! I had about all I could take at that job so Monday I wrote a letter explaining EVERYTHING I was unhappy with and walked out the door for good! There are multiple reasons...the company was not well organized, managed, owned... They had clients that were calling them, wondering where their invoices were from work that was done in FEB! They had some equip. stolen and never filed the insurance claim (for $20,000) and that was a year ago! When you can't manage things like that...how are you going to manage large clients and employees? There were numerous other things...the last straw being that they had cameras that watched all the employees and the owner could pull them up at anytime, even from home...WHAT? What the hell? That is not the way to keep good employees and that is why they have had massive turnover. They have 13 employees right now that have been there 3 months or less...And at least a few of those are ready to quit already too. I just did not want to waste my time or talents on something that was so obviously wrong for me. I am entitled to at least one walk out in my career, right?

Life has been great since Monday...I have had freelance work to do and I am actively pursuing more. I really like staying home with Chris and my puppies. I am able to take Max to the vet and make sure that he gets all his medicine on time...just be a mama to him. I LOVE IT!

Max is doing great. He had his 2nd round of chemo on Tues. and handled it like a champ! I just know that when we get another x-ray done of his chest that all this cancer is going to be GONE!

nice

This weekend has been nice so far. I was off yesterday so I got plenty of time to play with the puppies and get some stuff done that we needed to. We are having company for the first time this week, Chris's class is coming over to watch a movie on Wed. night. I am trying to get all the little stuff taken care of, like hanging pictures, etc. before they come over. Chris keeps telling me not to worry about it but I think it is just a girl thing, I like everything to be perfect.

We made a trip to "The Varsity" for lunch today...I was not very impressed...but it was huge! At least now I can say that I have been there! I am trying to convince Chris that we need to go to Six flags before the season is over. I could really use a fun day of screaming! We'll see if I can get him to comply!

Max is continuing to feel great. He did not get chemo this week because his white blood cell count was very low. They started him on an antibiotic to make sure he did not get sick and we are going to try again in a few days. I am so happy that he feels good and is carrying on like himself again! I have to make him hush....he is barking and woo-wooing so much! And eating like a pig! He has gained a few pounds thank goodness and I am trying to get him about 5 lbs overweight at least so if he has another episode it won't be as bad for him to lose a few lbs. Thanks so much for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers...

Thank God it is Friday!

This has been a long week! Started my new job...I like it ok, I think it will get better the more comfortable I get there. Right now there is a little weirdness just because they are growing so fast and no one really knows their place. But I think I will learn a lot and in the end, that is what matters!

Max seems to be doing good. The only side effect is diarrhea...which is ok as long as he can hold it till we get outside and he has been good so far! I am so glad to see him come back to life, it is amazing how much more like himself he has been the past few days. We are trying to put some weight on him and we are going to change his diet to a cancer diet...more protein and less carbs. I really want to do everything we can for the boy...

terrible

That is how this week has been. We found out yesterday that indeed Max does have lymphoma. His cancer is located in the lymph nodes around his chest. It has not spread which is good but he is considered stage IV. It is T-cell lymphoma which is worse than the other kind. Great.

We started his chemotherapy today and he seems better than he has in a while. My Maxy-boy is back for a while at least. We decided to treat it because we are not ready to lose him and dogs apparently usually tolerate chemo very well. We should know if he is responding in a week or two. If he does and we can get it into remission, we could possibly have another year or two with him (hopefully longer!) We have pet insurance so at least the cost is not a hinderance.

This just sucks. I don't know how else to describe it. At least we know what we are dealing with and we can start fixing it. I just really pray that this works. I love that boy. He is an incredible dog.